[This invited piece by our very own middle-of-the-road cartoonist and regular RR commenter, Bob Crabb, will set us all straight on his introduction of a new moniker to these pages.  In addition to his website, Bob’s work may be seen in the print and online editions of The Union, and is occasionally filched to be featured on RR.  He appears here with his copy editor Clovis.]

RL ‘Bob’ Crabb

Several readers of Rebane’s Ruminations have asked that I define my characterization of them as “right-wing dingbats”. I originally created a cartoon character by that name back in 1999, as the battle between conservatives and the liberals who had taken control of the Nevada County government was just beginning to heat up. My main inspiration was Drew Bedwell, who rose to prominence during that turbulent era, but the name could apply to any number of activists that emerged from the backwoods to fight for mom, apple pie, and property rights. Over the years I have refined the image, after studying the species in its native habitat.

The dingbat is conservative in nature, and there are many varieties. There are fiscal conservatives, religious conservatives, libertarian conservatives, green conservatives, liberal conservatives, and conservative liberals, the latter also known as the sub-species Blue Dog Democrats and Republicans-in-name-only (RINOS). The Urban Dictionary describes a dingbat as “someone who attempts to provide a definition of dingbat and misspells the word ‘retarded’ in his definition. (That would be Todd, who explains that he purposely does it to confound his opponents.)

In the common mythology, the dingbat was prominent in America until the Great Depression, when he was subdued and co-opted by the Liberal Green Treehugger. The dingbat during that time emulated the hard-drinking image of John Wayne, which made it vulnerable to the wiles of the seductive femi-nazi treehugger. He was co-opted, and went along with the treehugger program until the late seventies when he woke up one morning with a horrendous hangover. Looking to his left, he saw that he was trapped in bed with his natural enemy. His only means of escape required him to gnaw off his left wing, leaving him with limited flying abilities.

Over the years, he returned to his constitutional roots, expelling any vestige of progressive tendencies. Yet in his zeal to overcome the duplicitous nature of the liberals, he became obsessed with the writings of Saul Alinsky, the hero of libo-progresso-commu-socialism, and adopted many of his attributes.

For instance, Alinsky advised organizers (Tea Party) to focus their attention on a small number of selected strategic targets (limited government, fiscal responsibility). Spreading an organization’s passions too thinly was a recipe for disaster (abortion, gay rights).

Avoid the temptation to concede that his opponent (Frisch) was not the devil or that he possessed any admirable qualities (working to build a better community). Men will act when they are convinced that their cause is 100% on the side of angels and that the opposition is 100% evil.

Winning is the only objective, and will be achieved incrementally over time (forty-year plan). Any exaggeration, distortion, or outright lie is considered fair play. After all, that’s what the other side does. And so the dingbat becomes the very thing it has fought to destroy.

Some dingbats, in a rare moment of conciliation, have suggested that they part ways with the treehuggers peacefully (great divide), but they have infiltrated each others habitat to an extent that such a solution could never be achieved without violence. The truth is that the land they both covet, once separated by war, could be so weakened that it would become easy prey for other invasive species. Since its creation, the Republic has been contentious, is contentious, and will always be contentious. It is that diversity that keeps it vibrant and alive. E Pluribus Unum.