George Rebane

Apropos to the Terror Alert issued yesterday in Europe and America (US State Department) – all American tourists should “be vigilant” for terrorist attacks across the continent – notification of this response came to us from a friend in Great Britain.  We are about to take off for a short European holiday and our friend wanted us to know that the British were not going to sit idly by, but would instead mount a proactive defense which has all the earmarks of a well thought out plan that is bound to materially contribute to the safety of the nation.  I, of course, am more than hopeful that the other EU countries on the Continent will pick up on this grass roots innovative approach.  Judge for yourself.

WALK NAKED DAY – Don’t forget to mark your calendars.

As you may already know, it is a sin for a Muslim male to see any woman other than his wife naked and if he does, he must commit suicide.  So on Saturday at 1 PM, all British women are asked to walk out of their house completely naked to help weed out any neighbourhood terrorists.

Circling your block for one hour is recommended for this anti-terrorist effort.

All patriotic men are to position themselves in lawn chairs in front of their houses to demonstrate their support for the women and to prove that they are not Muslim terrorist sympathizers.  Since Islam also does not approve of alcohol, a cold 6-pack at your side is further proof of your patriotism.

The British government appreciates your efforts to root out terrorists and applauds your participation in this anti-terrorist activity.

God bless the British!
P.S.. It is your patriotic duty to inform others. If you don’t send this to at least 1 person, you’re a terrorist-sympathizing, lily-livered coward, and are possibly aiding and abetting terrorists.